Ethiopia is a beautiful country steeped in culture and history, it is known as the cradle of civilisation. As you travel through it you can go from mountains that sit 4,300 metres above sea level where you lose your breath not only from the thinning altitude but from the miles of magnificent beauty surrounding you. To the noise and bustle of 6 million people making their way around Addis Ababa, weaving in and out of outdoor markets and shops. It is formidable and somewhat unique in culture and history. But as with all countries it is not without its problems. Over 70% of the population live on less than $2 a day, it has recently suffered drought and famine as a result of the weather phenomenon El Nino, leaving 10 million people in desperate need of food security.
However in the midst of this and much like its beauty there are stories of transformation and change springing up all around. They are hard to ignore and in some cases even harder to believe. Families and communities are being lifted out of poverty, children who once went hungry are having three meals per day and attending school, relationships between husbands and wives are being restored. Communities and government representatives are coming together to work together for the good of the community.
Tearfund Ireland has been a part of these stories through supporting Self Help Groups and as we travelled through Ethiopia in October last year visiting with these self help groups we experienced all of this and more. The material and economic difference in the lives of the women and men involved in self help groups is nothing short of a miracle. But what stands out the most, what cannot be captured so easily is the restoration that is taking place. The change in relationships and marriages. The love and transformation that is so evident you can feel it deep within your soul.
On our last day in Ethiopia we met Woynishet. Woynishet has a remarkable story, a story of restoration and redemption, of a journey from isolation to partnership. Woynishet did not work, she raised her children and used the small amount of money her husband gave her to feed their family. Her children had never had breakfast before she joined her self help group. But joining the group required more than just turning up to meetings. Her husband was completely against it and Woynishet had no confidence or self-esteem. She felt powerless and useless but she knew she needed to do something to provide for her family. Ethiopia is a patriarchal society, gender inequality is widespread and domestic abuse can be common. So she and two other members began to meet in secret. All three of them had to hide what they were doing, one of them also experienced ongoing domestic violence and so they had to be particularly careful.
However as time passed and their income grew as a result of saving with their self help group so too did their confidence. They became stronger and more assertive, they realised their own potential and strengths. But they did not want to continue in this journey alone and separate to their husbands so they told them about the self help group and what they had been doing. All three of their husbands were furious and barred them from going to their group. However, the women courageously carried on. And as time went by their husbands began to notice that their economic situation was improving, they noticed that there was now more food for the family, that the children were able to attend school. That there was a difference in their wives. They each individually asked how this had happened and so the women explained that it was as a result of their self-help group.
Woynishet said that from that moment, their lives and relationships changed. Her husband began to look at her in a whole new light, he saw, for the first time her value and worth. That she could be an equal partner in their relationship and home. Each husband then insisted on the women always attending their self-help group and often took care of the children so the women could attend their meetings. They completely transformed, Woynishet went from being a woman, completely alone in her marriage, undervalued and powerless to being an equal, with a partner who respects her and consults her about everything in their life together. This is not a conventional love story but it is a story of how transformation can happen, of how love can grow from the most unusual and difficult of beginnings.
Woynishet and her self help group went on to hold a big ceremony in their community where they advertised the benefits of joining a self help group, using their own personal testimonies to encourage others to join. But she said that the most powerful testimony of all was when their three husbands stood up and with tears streaming down their faces, they told their community, their friends, their government representatives how they used to disrespect their wives, how they used to beat them and hurt them but how now they love and respect them. They spoke of how now they honour and support their wives, how their wives lifted their family out of poverty. How they love them, how they are partners in life and for life.
Theirs is a story of true transformation, of the power of healing and forgiveness. And it is a story of hope, hope that change is possible, that all circumstances can be turned around for good. That love can in fact, win.
‘And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.’ 1 Corinthians 13:13
First published for Tearfund Ireland
Photos: Gavin Leane
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